"Code Red"- Another Tool For Men To Brace Themselves Against Women
As I looked through my emails and RSS feed yesterday, I came across this article from the Washington Post:
‘Code Red’: iPhone/iPad app for men who need to track women’s menstrual cycles
After my initial chuckle and sending the article around the office, I became more disgusted by the idea of this. An IPhone (or IPad, to really bring home a disgusting visual) application that tracks the woman in your life’s menstrual cycle. Really- WHY would people want to know about someone else’s period?
I understand that some women may find this tool helpful for their own calendars, but this particular application is marketed to men. Here’s the description from the developer’s website:
Men’s best defense against the monthly Her-ricane.
Men no longer need to fear the wrath of menstrual madness. MEDL Mobile is pleased—and very relieved—to introduce Code Red: a simple but powerful menstrual calendar for men to keep track of—and survive—their girlfriend’s/fiancé’s/wife’s monthly cycle.
I’m already insulted by this. I get the stereotype of PMSing women and their horrible mood shifts, but come on. You don’t think we’re entitled to, if not a bit of understanding, some privacy?? The ad continues:
Simpler is Safer
All you have to do is set the start day of her most recent cycle, and the app takes care of the rest!
When the tracking starts, Code Red will provide special alert messages for every phase in her cycle. There are five different alerts, and each calendar day comes equipped with a wealth of tips and advice to brave even the most violent of storms.
- Smooth Sailing Alert — Let’s you know when she’s feeling like a team player.
- Horny Alert — Let’s you know when you’re able to score.
- PMS Alert — Let’s you know when to hit the (cold) showers.
- Ovulation Alert — Let’s you know when to sit on the sidelines (unless you’re ready to start a junior league).
- Code Red Alert — Let’s you know that it’s game time and you’re way out of bounds.
“Code Red will be a life saver for thousands of guys out there,” said Kevin Harrison, Co-Creator, “Its each guys personal color coded Terror Alert System…”
Are you kidding me? Terror Alert System? I have a pretty good sense of humor, but I’m not amused by the idea of any man in my life getting an alert that it’s time to “hit the showers” because I’m PMSing or that I’m “feeling like a game player” and now it’s safe to come around me.
What gets me even more is that a WOMAN helped build this application.
Code Red was facilitated through development by husband & wife team Kevin and Lisi Harrison. Kevin & Lisi have been together for 180 menstrual cycles. The recurring stress that always followed inspired them to find a way to help alleviate their shared aggravation over the monthly houseguest.
“It’s good for everyone; It’s a giant step towards world peace.” –Lisi Harrison
Way to betray the sisterhood, Lisi. In my mind, you’re now just as guilty and insulting to women as the Iranian official who claimed women cause earthquakes. Are we really so powerful that we can cause natural disasters? Then no wonder men around the globe are terrified of us and have to be alerted that “it’s game time and you’re way out of bounds.”
